“The story is tonight… She left one league to join another. Is that really tolerated? And will she get pummeled for doing it? Stay tuned.

June 4th is the date I have been waiting months for. This is the Tri City Thunder vs. Vermont game and TKOs. My old team. Now playing my new team. Killer Queens. At my old arena, too. It will be bittersweet. I know they will man up on me if they can because I intend to win that game. It will be a rivalry for sure.”


midnight matinee preamble: After dashing across the city from The Hangar after the Toronto Junior Roller Derby match to Ted Reeve Arena by the Debutante’s Leather Locklear, it was a pleasant surprise to see some familiar faces on the track, especially the Zebra in the form of Chocolate Meltdown who was first met at bouts up in Tri-City. That was just a hint of what was to come on the track. One of the offshoots of Tri-City is Royal City’s Bonny BruiseHer, a very friendly character off the track but once the game starts, all bets are off as you, Gentle Reader, are about to find out. Her progress through Derby is emblazoned by an attitude to playing instilled through Tri-City. Bonny BruiseHer takes over her story.

Derby enables you to be someone else. 

It’s like theatre.


We had practice three times a week out at the New Hamburg Arena with Thunder, Vicious Dishes and the Tramps. The minute we passed minimums. I remember it was a Tuesday night. I said to myself: “Tomorrow night, we will be scrimmaging with the ‘big girls'”, so I will always love Tri City. They taught me to be ready for everything and anything. It’s like going into battle…. but at my age I had to be realistic about what I could handle and how could I enjoy the sport? I made so many friends at the Guelph league and I wanted to be a part of developing the teams.


I couldn’t do any of it without my two trainers BareLeigh Legal Leigh Golden and Sin E Star Christianne Aussant. They pushed me literally. Leigh chased behind me at the KW Granite Club and said ‘go go go’! And I skated like the police were chasing me. Both were instrumental in my progress. If I went to the side of the arena, they would come over and ask if there was a problem. I would say ‘I just need a minute’ and they would say, “Get some water and get back out there!” And, of course, Amanda Bergeron Anita Martini was our primary trainer for fresh meat boot camp. She was army style no bullshit do it kind of gal, the best.

My first game was the London Lunch Ladies back in November last year. In October we had a scrimmage with the Royal City Roller girls. This was my team that was a smash squad. Then Tri City decided that because there were 14 of us who graduated boot camp to make the TKO’s or Total Knock Outs. By the way, I picked that title. My son trains at a mixed martial arts facility in Kitchener called TKO and I stole it. The girls loved it. So we played London and lost by 40 points. Meanwhile, I emailed different leagues and asked if I could scrimmage or come to practices. I played with the Death Row Dames and the Harlots in Hamilton. I kept ‘Ivy Rupted’ behind me the whole game. Once ya play them, it’s gravy in my book.


I left Tri City in February just after the draft. I wanted to go to Guelph, as I knew they needed help and I was excited to help build this league. I felt I had something to offer, as I have been a roller skater for over 30 years. My husband ‘Chocolate Meltdown’ is a past competitive roller skater turned referee followed me. We are so excited for Guelph and feel it is the right fit for us. We look forward to coaching the teams into victory.

Derby isn’t so different. 

I have been involved with musical theatre my whole life and performing in bands as well.

I perform the character Bonny BruiseHer when I’m on the track.
She is far more fearless [than I am].

Eyeing the hit


The game we played with the Debutantes was a shit storm and a real learning curve for Guelph. They schooled us and it was rough and tumble for sure. They have a rep for that, but which roller derby team doesn’t? The sport itself is full contact, and sometimes it’s more than others. This was a good example of my Tri City preparedness. I was ready for anything and was not disappointed. The Guelph girls hung on really well though throughout that game. I enjoyed the experience. Every team plays a different game. It’s all a mixed bag!

Give us six months and I promise you a better league.


[The Rollergettes invited the RCRG to come and scrimmage at George Bell Arena on May 28, an event that made the calendar of NOW magazine. RCRG came down with a contingent of five players plus their coach and a head zebra to play and advise with a Rollergettes roster of ten.]

I didn’t think i would be able to skate every single jam! Normally if you only have 5 girls it doesn’t matter because you mix it up when you get there. Our captain Mandy Maggotbone told them that we would play against them! Yikes! I couldn’t believe it and so we compromised. We play them, but we don’t race. We control them and slow it down.


Derby Life

This game is rough and tough and crazy. Everyone wants to play it…especially men! I love watching it, too. I love the Gore Gore girls! If I lived in T.O. I would beg to be on their team. I love going and watching. The Harlots were one of my favorites. I was glued to the TV all weekend on Canuck Derby TV. I wouldn’t want to tango with Mega Bouche. She’s a friend, but yikes! Thank goodness I can coach.

So thrilled that roller derby is back. I bore my friends talking about it…everyone should be so hooked. If I was only 20 years younger…


With Twitter and a tweet from Royal City comes the news:
“RCRG’s Killer Queens put up a great fight! Final score is 132-86 for TKO’s. Come watch all the RCRG home teams play on June 11th!”

At the end of the day, after a weekend back inside former home rink with my new team and going through the emotional and physical wars with them, all’s well that ends well. The love and respect that I feel from the league in Guelph cannot be put into words. Guelph has welcomed and embraced Chocolate Meltdown and me right into its fold and we love them back. We are looking forward to a long relationship with this league and love working on the coaching staff as well.”

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