Category: Chicks Ahoy!


The Beast of the East 2011 had changed the lay of the land as Toronto Roller Derby came in positions two, three and four behind the winners Rideau Valley.

The other sign of the apocalypse was Death Track Dolls first win over Chicks Ahoy!

So all manner of anticipation added to the buildup to the season closer at ToRD. A chance for revenge for Chicks Ahoy? Could the Dolls do it again? All those feelings go left by the wayside from the start as the Chicks Ahoy! started piling up the points. The programme was filled with faces not on the track.

Most notably absent in action was Land Shark out of the country, which left Santilly in Yo Face in her place on the jammer. And Night Ryder looked new at least to us.

It was not a good night to be a jammer with Death Track Dolls last night as Santilly in Yo Face and Jubilee were thrown into the fray along with Captain Betty Bomber and Slam Wow. Chicks Ahoy! had a find in Kookie Doe and Bala-Reina.

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Probably the first of many memorable hits left a vulnerable Santilly struggling for balance on the edge of the track while trying to re-enter when the Chicks absolutely levelled her.

By halftime, all doubts were erased that the Chicks Ahoy! were back. With a 111-13 half time score, Death Track Dolls faced a tough comeback.

Mr. Whistler laid out a whole list of reasons why the turnabout was in play. Land Shark missing necessitating a change in the jammer and blocker rotation with players shifting around positions, new players on the track, Marmighty and Rebel Rock-It playing their A-game as Chicks Ahoy! blockers. And of course, the key difference was this was a 60 minute bout as opposed to the twenty minute format of Beast of the East.

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The challenge for the Dolls according to ToRD TV commentator Derby Nerd was could the team hold the Chicks Ahoy! down to under 200 points. The two teams came out flying again in the second half, with Jubilee being added to the jammer rotation. The second half was even tougher but it ended up 198 – 35.

Both squads lay down their bodies and spilled blood on the track in a night of real hits and real action by real players. One can begin to hear the blood bubble again for the semi-final two vs three as Chicks Ahoy! and Dolls go head to head again for even more real hits, real action.

But for the of this night the Chicks cheer was heard again:

“We’re number fun! We’re number fun! We’re number fun! Ahoy!”

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/… more to come

It was great to see so many new leagues last year at GTA’s inaugural Fresh and Furious. Amongst the leagues playing was Sault Roller Derby.

To bring us up to date, some welcome and fresh words from Laura DevilZone up in SRD who venture a little bit northwards this weekend to roll against one of our favourite teams Sister Slag of NCRD.

“Our league in Sault Ste. Marie, the Sault Roller Derby League is now a registered NOT-for Profit Organization and we now have our very first team!

We are proud to unveil our new team! Please meet the “SOONAMI SLAMMERS” !

We are playing Sudbury (NCRD’s) Sister Slag on Sunday May 29th, in an exhibition game in the town of Espanola.

In July, our freshies will play in GTA’s Fresh n Furious II and our seasoned ladies will be coaching, reffing, and helping to NSO for the bouts.

We are working on an event for our new team and if all comes together, will be officially announcing the event soon!

We would like to invite all derby folks if they are passing through Sault Ste. Marie to come skate with us or visit anytime! Just FB message or give a shout out and we’ll hook you up with a practice time!

Much Derby ♥ !!! “

Good luck Sault and Sister Slag! Connect with SRD through their new site at:
SAULT ROLLER DERBY

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DSC_7242, originally uploaded by Midnight Matinee 24.

For fans of Chicks Ahoy! it is all about “WINNING!” Chicks Ahoy! who were last year’s finalists at the ToRD Championship final for the Boot looked to maintain form. Even with the loss of veterans such as Mach Wheels, the team felt revitalized with the injection of new talent such as Kookie Dough, Tess D’Urb-Evil. It keeps the team feeling young and the fresh rookies are someone you can tell Derby war stories to.

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And so it begins. Just around the corner too. No more warmups with Black & White or Cubs and Cougars. Becoming WFTDA Apprentice does that to you.

The new look Dolls and the champion Gore Gore Rollergirls start things off on the 5th of February.

CN Power kicks into action with the Killamazoo Derby Darlins from Kalamazoo. A fast and hard hitting team. Then Low Ride Her and company from Sister Slag fresh from Blood & Thunder represent Nickel City Roller Derby all the way from Sudbury against the D-VAS.

Then after the March 12th Match with the season debut of the black and blue Smoke City Betties with another infusion of rookie talent and Bruise Berry Pie marking her presence in ToRD going against the green of Chicks Ahoy!

Really looking forward to the next Quad City Chaos weekend – bringing in RVRG Rideau Valley Rollergirls, MTLRD, TCRG [Tri City Thunder!]] and Toronto Roller Derby all facing against each other. Fans should come out to see a cross-section of Canada Derby talent. Hopefully Montreal will bring in the New Skids on the Block who were the real eyeopeners of last year levelling all the teams yet they are all so friendly.

Toronto Roller Derby: Schedule

 

Saturday, February 5
6:30pm
ToRD – GGRG vs. DTD – Season Opener!

Saturday, February 26
6:30pm
ToRD – Double Header! CNP vs. KDD, D-VAS vs. NCRD

Saturday, March 12
6:30pm
ToRD – CA! vs. SCB

Saturday, March 26
Quad City Chaos!

Sunday, March 27
Quad City Chaos!

Saturday, April 9
6:30pm
ToRD – GGRG vs. CA!

Saturday, April 16
6:30pm
ToRD – DTD vs. SCB

Saturday, May 14, 2011
6:30pm
ToRD – GGRG vs. SCB

Saturday, May 28, 2011
6:30pm
ToRD – CA! vs DTD

Saturday, July 2, 2011
ToRD – Clam Slam!

Saturday, August 20, 2011
6:30pm
ToRD – CN Power vs. TBD

Where
75 Carl Hall Rd, The Hangar – Downsview Park, Toronto, ON

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We were totally prepared. Everything we tried worked.

Also speed kills. And that was essentially the key to the Gore Gore Rollergirls the champions from 2009 prevailing once again to win the Toronto Roller Derby finals for the year 2010 in the Battle for the Boot. Last year it was GGR triumphing over Smoke City Betties – this time the Chicks Ahoy! who claimed the boot in 2008 fell in a speedy and physical battle before the sold-out Hangar crowd. Not only were tickets sold out online in a matter of hours tickets throughout the city disappeared to eager fans and disappointing others who could not get theirs. Adding to the atmosphere of the anticipation was the presence of the Rogers Cable television camera crew who were on hand to film the bout for a December 4 broadcast at 8 p.m. Announcing in their booth in the stanchions was Monichrome and some nerdy Derby person. Everyone in and around the Hangar seemed to be dressed in their finest including a certain Skinned Knee Crosby with a certain uniform on finally! Leagues from all around were representing, a triumvirate of three from Tri-City, a Thames contingent to see Classic Joker in his so-called final ToRD bout, maybe Hammer City, GTAR kicks and all and definitely the large pack all the way from Kingston! [Even with the presence of Rogers, lighting was still pretty dark, something that would be nice for the ToRD ladies to work on]. The night also hailed the announcement in the game programme for the next Quad City Chaos on March 26 and 27 of 2011. Teams to be announced?

After warmups and waiting for the ticket crowd to finally make it through the doors while BDI put on an exhibition of her skills, the contest was on.

Speed on speed and power vs power – but maybe Gore Gore Rollergirls had a little more guile and pulled a few of the slow tactics to control the game. However, with the first jam that netted GGR two points Bambi versus Candy Crossbones on the line the Rollergirls never looked back.

Jammer on jammer hits and slowdowns – the Rollergirls rolling Bambi, Dust Bunny [who the sidetrack announcer kept on calling Caitlin for some reason], Lunchbox against the rotation of Mach Wheels, Candy Crossbones, Dyna Hurtcha, Kari Mia Bere for Chicks Ahoy! The bout was marred by Chicks Ahoy penalties – including a gross misconduct, maybe an illegal procedure – that got them into trouble in the box and allowed the GGR to slowly inch away. Chicks finally got onto the scoreboard with one point against 15 for GGR. Effective blocking by both sides kept the scoring runs down although the go for broke attitude resulted in big spills on the track. The score was remarkably low at 27 to single digit 9 in favour of the Gore Gore Rollergirls with four minutes left in the first half.

The thirty minute intermission was an opportunity to hear The Cowbell Choir again who were at the previous semi-final with the Death Track Dolls and the Chicks Ahoy!

Second half the margin was still only at thirty with a 46-16 lead at the 20 minute mark and counting down. The penalty troubles accrued for Chicks Ahoy! with them standing only with two players in the pack while they tried to fend off power jam situations that eventually sped up the Gore-Gore Rollergirls ascent up the scoreboard. With the Chicks Ahoy! held at 16, the Gore Gore-Rollergirls were at 65 then 80 after a 15 point jam. GGR reached the century mark at 105-27 with two minute left and a final jam or two. Missing in action was Crankypants who in his other position in the world was at the Gemini Awards. Well la-de-dah la-de-dah. Actually if there is anyone who supports the Canadian arts it is he. Not to say that Mr Whistler and that was Hot Roller? did an evil job but no one cranks the crowd to GET LOUDER! LOUDER! than Crankypants.

The inevitable last jam came and the Gore-Gore Rollergirls claimed the Boot amidst lots of hugs and cheers. Maybe the We Are The Champions music was missing.

Meanwhile up in Tri-City on the Saturday afternoon the Luscious Lunch Ladies from Forest City stormed into the New Hamburg arena of the Thunder to take on the Total Knock Outs in a battle of rookie teams. The Luscious Lunch Ladies in another incarnation who had taken on Rollergettes of WEWRA and then Nickel City’s Sister Slag as part of the double header with Thames Fatales and Hamilton Harlots. Although the TKOs lost 72-26 they did TCRG proud and it’s just one step in their quest to dominate the world. Forest City may have something to say about that.

And November 24 from Timmins Roller Derby arises with
Timmins Meet and Greet Come out to our First Skate and meet tonight Wednesday, November 24th 7:00-8:00 pm Mountjoy Arena. Please bring $3 for admission to the skate.

Go Timmins!

And that marks the end of a season and our second ToRD finals. When we stepped into the world that November ago those finals were only the beginning in the year in the life of this so-called photographer trying to figure out what was happening on the track and prying our cramped fingers off our poor Nikon and knowledge out of those in the know. And remembering the focus of it all should always be those ladies fresh meat, new leagues or veteran teams alike on the track who are giving it their all.

[

[... this is a piece in progress]

’twas the night before Championships
and all through the ToRD house
not a Chick or Gorey Creature was stirring
not even a Dangermouse

The fishnet stockings were hung by the chimney
with great care
with the hopes that the Boot would soon be theirs

Dreams, I have dreams when I’m awake when I’m asleep
And you, you are in my Dreams
You’re underneath my skin, how am I so weak

And now in my dreams,

I can feel the weight, I can just come clean
I keep it to myself, I know what it means
I can’t have you, but I have dreams



 

Take the talent from the team in CN Power pink and black and morph the team in green could what that transpires be a glimpse of the finals at Toronto’s The Hangar this weekend?

Speed vs power – trap vs dexterity – savvy vs wits – veterans vs. veterans

The action is on the floor on Saturday in a celebration of ToRD – tickets sold out? Dig in the Tailgate party beforehand and enjoy the spirt that will be Derby and otherwise.

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How long, can you hold your breath?
Can you count to ten, can you let it pass?
Keep, can you keep it in?
Keep it behind lashes, can you make it last?

 

Once again as of November 13, 2010
The place to be this weekend and all in all the most fun so get out there if you can and price of admission is a donation to Food Bank, bring a can of food or more:
Total Knock Outs vs. Luscious London Lunch Ladies
Time: 13 November · 15:00 – 18:00
Location: New Hamburg Arena
251 Jacob St.
New Hamburg, ON
This is an early friends and family bout to benefit the Food Bank of Waterloo Region.
Doors open at 2:30 p.m., first whistle at 3 p.m.
Admission is a donation of cash or non-perishable food item for the food bank!

And now in my dreams, I can feel the weight
I can just come clean

I keep it to myself, I know what it means
I can’t have you, but I have dreams
Oh, I have dreams, I have dreams
Dreams, I have dreams when I’m awake when I’m asleep
And you, you are in my Dreams
You’re underneath my skin, how am I so weak

And now in my dreams,

I can feel the weight, I can just come clean
I keep it to myself, I know what it means
I can’t have you, but I have dreams

How long, can you hold your breath?
Can you count to ten, can you let it pass?
Keep, can you keep it in?
Keep it behind lashes, can you make it last?

And now in my dreams, I can feel the weight
I can just come clean

 

I keep it to myself, I know what it means
I can’t have you, but I have dreams
Oh, I have dreams, I have dreams

– Brandi Carlile, “Dreams”

SMOKE CITY BETTIES 2009 AT TORD CHAMPIONSHIPS 2009 VS. GORE GORE ROLLERGIRLS
SMOKE CITY BETTIES – 2009 – TORD CHAMPIONSHIPS SMOKE CITY BETTIES VS. GORE GORE ROLLERGIRLS

CHICKS AHOY! [HOME] VS. SMOKE CITY BETTIES [AWAY]
THE HANGAR
SEPTEMBER 11, 2010

One year ago:

Smoke City Betties Championship Game Roster November 21, 2009
(versus Gore Gore Rollergirls)

Manager – Coreylicious
#48 – Hot Roller – captain
#58 – Miss Behaviour – captain
#88 – Crimson Shivers
#36 – Demolition Dawn
#21 – Dyna Hurtcha
#4 – Jewel Kicker
#82 – Janis D’Menace
#15 – Lady Frost
#22 – Marvel S Maven
#26er – Pretty Peeved
#11 – Slaughter Lauder
#23 – Thunder Struck
#56 – Memphis Kitty
#34 – Lacy Brawler

Smoke City Betties roster September 11, 2010
(versus Chicks Ahoy! at kast game of regular season)

#48 – Hot Roller
#090 – Sail-Her Poon
#5 de mayo – Diva Zapata!
#13-I – Genuine Risk
#8008 – Grim Avenger
#34A – Lacy Brawler
#15 – Lady Scorcher
#56 – Memphis Kitty
#17 – Mouth of the South
#26er – Pretty Peeved
#32 – P Doddy
#78 – Platinum Bomb
#1983 – Sin D Drop-Her
#1337 – titmouse
#47 – Tropic Thunder

Manager – Mia Culprit
Manager – Quickdraw

By apparent count that is 1 2 3 4 5 7 8 9 10 new actual faces on the Betties roster that faced the following Chicks Ahoy! team:

Chicks Ahoy!

#765 – Fubar Bundy – captain
#96 – Hum Dinger – captain
#2/3 – Blammo

#99.1 – Candy Crossbones
#10 – Cherri Nova
#88 – Crimson Shivers
#01 – Dolly Destructo
#21 – Dyna Hurtcha
#-40 – Fireweed
#2 – Furious Georgia
#98m/s² – G-Force
#65 – Hoff
#06 – Kara Mia Beere
#v12 – Mach Wheels
#NZ41 – Marmighty
#22 – Marvel S. Maven
#26 – MegaBouche
#2×4 – Nasher the Smasher
#7 – Rebel Rock-It
#34A – Robber Blind
#L7 – Tara Part

So what is the compelling story here? The tale of a (0-2 this season) team with a roster turnover of 10 new rookies infused amongst  some determined Pretty Peeved holdovers [which also included duo Ls Lacy Brawler, Lady Scorcher and the hot Hot Roller and Memphis Kitty]  who had been outscored in their previous two bouts 248-58 by Gore Gore Rollergirls and 213-53 by Death Track Dolls?

The other story could be the a team shift in the offseason that has Dyna Hurtcha back on skates for the first time and Marvel S. Maven along with Crimson Shivers now wearing the green of Chicks Ahoy! (1-1) instead of the black and blue they were photographed in last year and now facing old comrades?

Remarks  from Quickdraw regarding the Betties response to their opposition: “Sure, the Chicks are heavy hitters and can create a tricky wall to get through but all of the Betties’ jammers will just keep fighting until they find a way. A few of our starting lines even [have/had] players that are used to being either pivots or blockers in the jammer position. It gives those Betties a chance to try out in a game what they have excelled at in practices and possibly throw off the opposing team who are used to how our regular jammers skate.”

First jam saw Chicks Ahoy! #99.1 Candy Crossbones against Smoke City Betties #15 Lady Scorcher on the jammer line with Grim Avenger on pivot, Platinum Bomb, Sail-Her Poon, and P-Doddy against Chicks Ahoys!’ Dyna Hurtcha, #L7 Tara Part on pivot, Mega Bouche and Marmighty.

Candy Crossbones quickly raced ahead of the pack for the home side and their co-ordinated positioning put the Betties on the inside behind a pack of green, keeping Lady Scorcher from getting through while Candy Crossbones moved outside and achieved the first Chicks grandslam of the night and a 5-0 lead. Tropic Thunder tried her best next at jammer with Lacy Brawler at pivot, Mouth of the South, Genuine Risk and and  against the Chicks pack of Nasher, Dyna, Hoff and Robber Blind and jammer Kara Mia Beere.

After 3 jams the score was 34-0. Dyna Hurtcha built the lead for Chicks Ahoy! to a 44-0 lead before Hot Roller was able to score the first three points for the Betties.

By about the sixth jam it was 70-3. Slowing down and containing the Betties pack was the key to long jammer passes by Chicks Ahoy! as they relentless ratcheted their hold on the scoreboard.

There were many different jammer duels thrown into the fray. For the rest of the bout Chicks Ahoy had Rebel Rock-It, Kara Mia Beere, and Dyna Hurtcha on the jammer line facing Hot Roller, Pretty Peeved, Tropic Thunder and Titmouse and Lady Scorcher [who jams for CN Power too]. Tara Part was back in action after an absence while the Betties welcomed back Sail-Her Poon. Also rolling for Chicks Ahoy! Mega Bouche, Nasher the Smasher and even Hoff.

First period score ended 130-14. No matter the score, the informal poll of the fans signaled a clear victory in cheering for the Betties.

The second period stepped up the action with Rebel Rock-It scoring 25 which was a new ToRD record to make it 204-23. Then after Mega Bouche jammed, Candy Crossbones scored 25 of her own to make it 229-26. Dyna Hutcha tried for 25 but ran out of time and had to settle for 19  on a jam that featured a mega collision with a scary moment of Tropic Thunder laying on the track. Lady Scorcher responded with a grand slam of her own for a 248-33 comeback.

Even when the Chicks Ahoy! got into penalty problems they countered with the new deadslow start and blocking at the pivot line, a puzzling to the fans strategy that had been seen used by Lake Effect Furies against CN Power at the Hangar and the Sexpos bout with Tri-City Thunder earlier.

Then the Betties could not score on power jam situations. Chicks Ahoy! were a smooth executioner in pack positioning, edging the Betties jammers into cutting track on the inside while the roguelike Marmighty #41 positioned herself on the outside and hit hard [not unlike the Montreal Sexpos K-Dawg #42]. The score ended at 266-42-the circling of the track by both teams to high five the fans signalled the conclusion of the ToRD regular season for 2010 and the battle for second place in the hands of Chicks Ahoy!

Coach Quickdraw of the Betties feels it has been a rewarding process nonetheless, “It’s been great to see the both the returning Betties and new recruits learn to skate together and learn from each other since this season started. The more practice and bout time that the team gets behind them, the better they’ll become. Once everyone is skating together to the point where they can better anticipate and react to what their teammates and their opponents will do in the pack situation at the time, they’ll most definitely be a tough team to beat.”

Next game is October 2-the start of the semi-finals playoff season with the same Smoke City Betties [now 0-3] going against first place and  undefeated Gore Gore Rollergirls [3-0].

GORE GORE ROLLERGIRLS VS. SMOKE CITY BETTIES – ToRD CHAMPIONSHIP GAME NOVEMBER 21, 2009
SMOKE CITY BETTIES VS. GORE GORE ROLLERGIRLS – ToRD CHAMPIONSHIPS NOVEMBER 21, 2009
BETTIES VS. GORIES – ToRD CHAMPIONSHIPS 2009 – NOVEMBER 21, 2009

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